Books in My Future; Books in My Past

Lists…what would I do without lists? These days I would likely end up meandering around Meijer wondering why I was there, again, unsure if I need anything at all. I make lists everywhere – on the back of random flyers from businesses, the backs of junk mail envelopes, scraps of notebook paper, and the Notes app on my phone. I make to-do lists, grocery lists, lists of errands I need to run, goals I want to accomplish, and phone calls I need to make. However, the longest lists are comprised of all the books I want to read.

It seems I am always running into book recommendations! News articles, blogs, social media posts, Goodreads, friends, and the Libby app all offer a constant stream of possibilities, and I feel helpless to pass up the opportunity to note titles and authors for my future reads.

So, I make lists – plural – everywhere.

The other day, while organizing my home office, I found three different lists of book titles and authors in three separate places. This is not uncommon for me. In Libby I have several tags, and my “want to read” tag currently has 214 books on it!

Ironically, though my “want to read” lists exceed the likelihood of my ability to read all of them, I find myself now and again returning to a book that I have read before or started reading but did not finish. It doesn’t happen often, but I am consistently surprised by my experience when it does.

Just this week I restarted The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt. I first borrowed this book in April 2020. I had heard a lot of chatter around this award-winning novel, so I began listening to it. I remember struggling from the very beginning, and I abandoned it after the first 5% - it was depressing and difficult to get into. However, today it is a completely different book! I mean, it is the same book, but a whole new experience because I am a whole new person. April 2020 was in the very early days of the pandemic, and I was in a very bad place with my health; but now I am healthy and can approach the book with a whole new focus. This time I am enjoying The Goldfinch (even if it is a bit drawn out), and I am happy that I decided to return to it.

This also happened when I was in my early 20’s. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger was required reading for one of my college classes. I had read it when I was 15, and I remember being a bit bewildered by it. It wasn’t bad, but I felt like I couldn’t relate to any character in the book. Fast forward about eight years and several psychology classes later, and suddenly I understood things in a whole new way! I didn’t suddenly love it, but my life experiences made this classic a completely different book for me, and I reveled in my new view on it.

I have even reread some books multiple times, including the Hunger Games trilogy by Suzanne Collins. Just the same, a book on my TBR list may be available for months, but I don’t pick it up.

Nevertheless, I will keep adding to my “want to read” book lists. One day, future me may grab a title and wonder why I hadn’t read it before!